My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Randomize
