He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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