He disabled his match.com account in front of me
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
