We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize