It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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