I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize