when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
So much rum. So many feels.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Randomize
