In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Contemplating These 27 Questions Will Make Your Brain Explode
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
25 People Confess The Most Shocking Things They’ve Ever Seen In Public
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.