Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize
