I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
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