I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Randomize