Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Is it because I queefed?
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize