Texts From Last Night

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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.

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  (610): I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace. http://tfl.nu/hmhd
  Replies (48) Good night (7696) Bad night (1156)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  how was your night?

  (212): View more from New York

  well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?

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  (609): how was your night? (212): well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was? http://tfl.nu/mtku
  Replies (24) Good night (1325) Bad night (4195)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  consequently i now know what mace tastes like

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  (402): consequently i now know what mace tastes like http://tfl.nu/a9b7
  Replies (11) Good night (1745) Bad night (5939)
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  (718): View more from New York

  The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.

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  (718): The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be. http://tfl.nu/vr33
  Replies (5) Good night (3511) Bad night (1303)
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.

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  (901): i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation. http://tfl.nu/cktw
  Replies (5) Good night (1374) Bad night (2544)
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  (507): View more from Minnesota

  So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.

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  (507): So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning. http://tfl.nu/28fz
  Replies (4) Good night (907) Bad night (2452)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.

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  (561): If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying. http://tfl.nu/hkz1
  Replies (3) Good night (1691) Bad night (702)
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  (765): View more from Indiana

  Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun

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  (765): Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun http://tfl.nu/oe4f
  Replies (9) Good night (1067) Bad night (1925)
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  (231): View more from Michigan

  I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.

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  (231): I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it. http://tfl.nu/oche
  Replies (8) Good night (1798) Bad night (895)
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.

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  (+61): I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken. http://tfl.nu/mq32
  Replies (7) Good night (1209) Bad night (774)
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  (309): View more from Illinois

  It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.

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  (309): It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change. http://tfl.nu/p0m1
  Replies (14) Good night (1218) Bad night (1084)
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  (607): View more from New York

  Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah

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  (607): Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah http://tfl.nu/9m89
  Replies (7) Good night (924) Bad night (457)
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  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg

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  (774): did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise (908): omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg http://tfl.nu/l4h8
  Replies (5) Good night (1283) Bad night (565)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome

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  (732): Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome http://tfl.nu/8jcl
  Replies (27) Good night (2224) Bad night (2282)
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  (845): View more from New York

  You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.

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  (845): You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts. http://tfl.nu/ido5
  Replies (3) Good night (586) Bad night (319)

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