I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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