just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize