Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
Houston, we have a squirter
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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