I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
