Texts From Last Night

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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex

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  (570): the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex http://tfl.nu/q8xg
  Replies (28) Good night (4383) Bad night (759)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!

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  (603): thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful! http://tfl.nu/mwds
  Replies (60) Good night (3351) Bad night (7755)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY

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  (210): every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY http://tfl.nu/204o
  Replies (19) Good night (6579) Bad night (972)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.

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  (919): My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet. http://tfl.nu/ix9e
  Replies (68) Good night (18132) Bad night (1403)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...

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  (248): I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high... http://tfl.nu/j3oh
  Replies (55) Good night (5720) Bad night (1367)
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  (450): View more from Quebec

  I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life

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  (450): I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life http://tfl.nu/01gr
  Replies (7) Good night (4069) Bad night (1032)
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights

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  (812): woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights http://tfl.nu/5oxk
  Replies (16) Good night (1080) Bad night (2694)
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.

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  (804): well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd. http://tfl.nu/39zt
  Replies (2) Good night (2552) Bad night (837)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  did you find a tooth?

  (254): View more from Texas

  did you lose one?

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  (512): did you find a tooth? (254): did you lose one? http://tfl.nu/1ieh
  Replies (16) Good night (3526) Bad night (1301)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.

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  (630): You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that. http://tfl.nu/mbpz
  Replies (14) Good night (1745) Bad night (1247)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  Wheres my essay?

  (415): View more from California

  You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?

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  (410): Wheres my essay? (415): You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway? http://tfl.nu/m6g1
  Replies (8) Good night (845) Bad night (2055)
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  (845): View more from New York

  I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"

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  (845): I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl" http://tfl.nu/lnr2
  Replies (5) Good night (1211) Bad night (741)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps

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  (609): Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps http://tfl.nu/8xhn
  Replies (5) Good night (2429) Bad night (470)
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  (302): View more from Delaware

  Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...

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  (302): Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week... http://tfl.nu/cclg
  Replies (3) Good night (406) Bad night (712)
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  (270): View more from Kentucky

  His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.

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  (270): His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina. http://tfl.nu/fw3t
  Replies (2) Good night (254) Bad night (568)

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