Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
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