EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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