I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Randomize
