If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
