She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize