remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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