come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
