You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
