we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
