the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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