somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
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