the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
He better not be in your backpack
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize