I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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