Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Randomize
