He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
