new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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