I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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