i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Rumble strips road head = magical
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize