Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
