Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
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