dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
