Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Randomize
