do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Randomize
