im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
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