I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
