Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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