The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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