WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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