I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
well, you know. whores of a feather.
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