used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Randomize
