____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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