saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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