Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize